November 6, 2011

Finding Joy in the Journey

It still blows my mind that we are already in November and that Thanksgiving is just 3 weeks away.  The weather had definitely gotten much colder and we have already had our first snow fall.  I am not sure I am ready for snow yet but tis the season.
Our Sunday turned out to be pretty good.  The kids did fairly well in church today and we didn't have to roam the halls with Ellie. Instead, Lance took the second hour with her and I took third hour since Lance had to teach the Priests today.  We only had to stand back in the corners of the room this time.  She is getting better, she still likes to be on the move but she is getting better.
Our lesson in Relief Society was on President Monson's talk, Finding Joy in the Journey.  I love that talk. I refer back to it quite abit to help myself get back on track.  Sister Payne taught it so well. I felt like I connected with everything she shared with us.  She is a very sweet woman in our ward who just adores Ellie. Everytime she sees her she comes up and it makes Ellie smile from ear to ear.  We discussed a lot about what our parents did to make us feel important growing up.  We talked about all the things we can do to help our own children feel loved and important. 
She shared with us about what her life was like after having her 5th child.  She said that she was not happy.  She woke up grumpy.  She just didn't like life at all. She was tired and just wanted her free time.  She went on to explain how she developed a close relationship with Christ.  I was all of a sudden brought to tears because I felt like she was talking about me.  I have been feeling all of those things and it I felt like it was okay to feel those things but how I acted on them was a different story. 
Life right now is kinda hard for me.  Having 4 little ones has presented its challenges.  I know I am up to it. I know that Lord knows that too.  Has it been easy for me? Most definetly not!  Most days I feel like throwing in the towel and calling it quits because if I have to change one more dirty diaper, break up a fight, trip over another toy for the 10th time that day or listen to my little one scream herself to sleep, I am going to go bonkers.  Some days I just sit back and marvel and this crazy life Lance and I have together.  Look how far we have made it, and I think of how much further we have to go and it is overwhelming at times. 
This past week I have really dedicated to helping Ellie sleep better.  It has not been easy at all.  She is quite the fighter and most times she cries and cries but I can say she is getting better.  It makes it really hard to go anywhere because I have made the commitment to stay home 99% of the time to help her out.  My kids might think it is boring but I keep telling myself that it will pay off in the end. She is already sleeping alittle better during the day.  Even though it is in her swing she is sleeping more.  Nights, well she goes down alittle easier.  She has had to cry it out but the longest has only been about 25 minutes.  Which listening to it makes it seem like forever but really it isn't that long.  She still wakes up once or twice but other than that she is doing pretty good.  Its the other three boys that don't sleep well.  One of them is always trying to sleep in our bed or crying for us to come and lay with them.  Our nights are alittle hectic sometimes.  Needless to say we don't get much sleep so sometimes earlier bedtimes allow us to get a good head start on a long night ahead.
We have been using the doTERRA Essential Oils and there is a technique called the Aroma Touch and my boys LOVE it! Almost every night they ask for them and want me to rub their backs.  They say it give them "good nightmares" instead of bad ones. We are loving them!
Now is 9:04 p.m. and it is time for bed.  So today's lesson for me is recognizing the joy in the journey and finding happiness in family living. Since this is the month to express our gratitude, I am grateful for my family and for what they mean to me.  They are my rock and my life.  Oh how I love you!!!

1 comment:

The Kynastons said...

Oh man, I am feeling that way some days just with TWO kids! I don't do very well on little sleep and right now with a newborn and a two-year-old that wakes up at 5 am, we are getting VERY little sleep. It makes for long days and grumpy mommy. But this post is a good reminder of what's important. I think I'll go re-read that talk by President Monson to give myself a boost. :) I'm glad Ellie is sleeping a little better for you. And I wouldn't worry about her napping in the swing...Macie napped exclusively in her swing for a few months because it was the only way I could get her to sleep. She eventually grew out of it and hasn't had any lasting defects from it, haha. Good luck!