My Challenge

Was there ever a time in your life when you wanted something that you knew was going to be hard, barely attainable and often times never given to you?  I have!  I dread those times. I still look back on my life and remember some of the things that I wanted, something I prayed for, something I worked pretty hard for but still never got it. I remember coming home from my mission feeling pretty good about what I wanted and where life was going to take me, but realizing that it was going to be something that I couldn't have. I had a list of things I was going to do and people I was going to see, places I wanted to visit and all the plans I just knew were going to fall into place.  Well, life had different plans for me.  Even though my plans were good, honest things, Heavenly Father decided to change my list of wants, or I should say needs.
This year I have decided to focus on myself.  Is that selfish? Probably yes, but it was time.  This year I made a list of things I wanted to do. Things I wanted to accomplish for myself and for no one else. This year I felt ready.  So I decided what the heck, go for it.  I set some of my goals little higher but I knew that if I put my mind to it I could do it.
Yesterday was the last day of our 3 month challenge.  I LOVED it! It was just what I needed and I am going to continue to do it.  There are somethings I can control and my body is one of them.  I have lost over 10 lbs and I have more to lose and I LOVE the way I feel.  Is that bad for me to say? Maybe all of this is something I should keep to myself but this is for me.  This is my way of journeling so even if no one reads my blog, it is for me.  For the record.
Even though I didn't win the challenge I feel like I got far more out of it then just weight loss and learning to love working out. It has become routine for me.  I am one of those who thrive off of routine.  Call me weird, but it is the honest truth.  My kids do too.  I am going to keep doing it even though all the other girls have stopped.  The hardest thing for me was no eating sugar.  I allowed myself one day a week to eat all the sugar I wanted and that was on Sundays. Sundays were off limits. I would eat all I wanted and however much I wanted.  It really didn't affect my weight but man o man each Sunday evening my stomach would really pay for it.  Was it worth it?  Part of me says yes, and a huge part of me is sreaming NO! Maybe that part will need to be altered or changed.  Either way, this challenge was just what I needed.  I am going to keep doing it. It has become my routine and I am comfortable with it. 
My challenge was also to not to raise my voice to my kids.  Well that part of the challenge will always need to be worked on.  Children will always be my challenge. Trying to figure out how to be the perfect mom will always be my challenge.
Yesterday at church we learned something very disheartning about a great family in our ward.  Something from the past has come back to haunt them and it is something huge.  Very sad for the kids, spouse, everyone involved. Even thougth I don't know all the details my heart still aches for them.  Bad things happen to good people.  I have come to learn that if we are living the way we are suppose to then the Lord will help lighten the load that tends to hang heavy on our shoulders.

I received a new calling.  I was released as a ward missionary and put into cub scouts.  I know you are probably laughing right now, but it is true.  I am a new den mother.  Me a den mother. Funny ha!
I knew it was going to be coming sooner or later. I have three boys. I am going to be a pro at this once they get into scouts. Keaton is just one year away from it.  Here we go!!! I get to wear a scout shirt. This is going to be funny.  More to come that later on.

So here's to 3 months of my challenge going strong. It is going to get even better from here on out. Wish me luck!